You have probably heard the phrase "what you resist persists."
Lets take a look at how it applies to your life."
Whenever we are experiencing discontentment or unhappiness, there is inevitably something that we are resisting. All suffering is caused by non-acceptance of what is. It may be a thought, a feeling, an emotion or a situation. You suffer when you want things to be different from how they are. What you resist persists.
Most of the time, it is NOT the experience itself that causes us pain and suffering, rather the resistance TO the experience. How you label the experience determines how you feel.
We are conditioned from a young age to categorize our experiences into good and bad, right and wrong, desirable and undesirable.
Lets say you are feeling down. The mind will unconsciously label the feeling as "bad."
In the absence of labeling, it is simply a feeling ...it may be uncomfortable but it is not a problem in itself.
There is nothing "wrong" with feeling sad ...unless the mind says so.
The typical commentary may be:
"What is wrong with me?, I wish I didn't feel like this, When is it going to go away?" How to be happy when we are battling against what is already there?
Through habit, the mind will also latch onto something as the cause
of the feeling ...the girlfriend, the job, the weather ( a big one here
in Scotland! )
Who knows what the real reason is? Often feelings of being flat or down have absolutely nothing to do with us. You could be picking up on the earthquake in Japan or your neighbours having an argument.
Conscious people experience the exact same thoughts and feelings as everyone else. The difference is the recognition that:
1. there is nothing 'wrong' with the feeling being there.
2. it is not personal ...feelings simply appear by themselves.
3. all feelings come and go so why give too much attention to whatever shows up in any particular moment?
So, the key to finding inner peace is to become aware of all you are resisting and to make the conscious choice to simple let it be as it is.
You can see how viewing your world in this way could allow an experience of continuous contentment, regardless of what you are experiencing.
In fact, if you could truly say YES! to EVERY experience, you would eliminate the possibility of ever suffering.
Now, when you feel down, the commentary may be "Wow! This is interesting!" You feel sad but there is no problem.
The Law of Attraction states that 'like attracts like'.
As what you resist persists, attempting to push certain experiences away only serves to draw more of the same to ourselves. Through focusing on what we don't want, we attract more of it.
Worrying, for example, is praying for that which we don't want.
A far better (and more peaceful) approach is to consciously offer no resistance.
Acknowledge what is there, roll out the welcome mat and know there is nothing "wrong" with it.
Be attentive to any commentary about the experience. There is no need to fix or change anything. Wanting to fix it will create more of it. Simply seeing it is enough. Then see what happens!
If it is true that what you resist persists, the opposite is equally true ...namely, that what you embrace dissolves.
Negative states persist because we give them energy and importance through giving them all of our attention. When we offer no resistance, they wither and fade away. And, even if they do remain, that is OK too!
Dropping our resistance to what already is and allowing the mind to do its thing without getting involved, are two of the key themes outlined in my book "Kick The Thinking Habit - How To Make Peace With A Busy Mind".
Click on the book image to find out more.
Return To The Top Of This Page: What You Resist Persists
Return To The Homepage: Finding Happiness